18 July, 2025
You're never going to get me on board with being scared of "the streets" or "street psychos" as most martial arts dojo seem to understand them. I have dropped attackers before with Ninpo Taijutsu, and trying to make me afraid of some illusion of a bad guy criminally undersells the effectiveness of what I'm being taught, and what has already saved my life in the past.
When "street psychos" live in your head rent-free, you just keep feeding that illusion fear and your mind gets stuck in an unknown future. You only hurt your own feelings with the illusion you've created in your head, and you're fighting something that only keeps growing stronger no matter how good you get at Taijutsu.
Turned the other way, when past "street psychos" live in your head rent-free, your mind will get stuck in the past with an inner demon. This is my problem. I gravitate more toward the incredibly challenging exercises that don't necessarily look like a real fight, but are helpful for focusing on what might otherwise be subtle about distance and timing. Sometimes, realistic "street" exercises give me tunnel vision toward that inner demon, and I need to process that.
This is the ura and omote of fear, and Budo is about learning courage. Fudo Myoo carries a sword to cut through illusion and a rope to bind inner demons. I take inspiration from this toward my practice, so that I can learn to live in the present.